All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
