he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
Randomize
