You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
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