you're like a bully in the Christmas story
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Randomize
