I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize