Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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