is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize