That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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