Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
