i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
