Your tits are I can't wait for
Tonight was fucked up. First my mom called me and told me I had to go to the bar to pick up my dad 'cause he was drunk. Then when I got there my dad was doing a body shot from this lady who happened to be my 1st grade teacher. By far the most awkward car ride home. Idk if I should tell my mom or not.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize
