He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
