I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
