Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
He cannot be your sugar daddy. He looks like a literal hot dog.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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