Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
