i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
I tried to think of the best possible thing I could do for my 30th birthday, and the finalist is "get a clit ring"
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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