i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
Randomize
