her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
