Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
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