I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
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