she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
