STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize