at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Randomize
