I think my fart just growled at me.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
Randomize
