can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
