I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
Randomize
