I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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