And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
