we have pet lesbian snakes
You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Broken heels while double fisting margaritas, picking up shirtless, bloody men and escorting them out of harms way, the meltdown when I realized I can go without a bra bc my boobs shrunk, the morning vodka red bull you were forced to drink? Which one roped you in?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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