So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
