I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
