We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
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