can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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