so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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