take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
I told her I'd give her some of the cream I was using so she didn't get my warts. That's when I realized I was too drunk.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
