I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
