So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
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