i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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