thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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