Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Randomize