If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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