READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
