I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
