i just wanna soil my oats bro
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
you kept shouting 'jesus penis' when i was on the phone with 911
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
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