next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
