I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Randomize
