Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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