After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
So as you were leaving, you leaned on the table too much and 3 glasses slid and fell to the floor. You then looked at me and said "To be honest, glass isnt that expensive anyways" and stumbled out of the bar.
Randomize