i need an iv and a liver transplant
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
handjob tips. give me some.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
