So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Randomize
