somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
Randomize
