so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Randomize